Over the Weekend.....

* Chad was away at Scout Camp for 24 hours.  He left Friday @3:30 and returned home @ 5:00 Saturday night.  I realized this weekend that I need to get over my pity parties.. and accept that we made covenants in the Temple to be willing to Sacrifice our time and talents to the Lord.. and I need to quit whining.  My husband loves his calling (job in the church ) working with the youth weekly.. and camping with the youth monthly.  We all make sacrifices in our lives.. and I need to step it up.


*I went to lunch with a good friend over the weekend.. and it was just what I needed.
Some girl time to just "talk."
It feels re-energizing to leave the house once a week and "fill my well."
Do something just for me.


* We drove up to Heber yesterday.  My cousin is leaving to serve a mission in Hawaii.. and we went to listen to her talk.. and then drive to their house/cabin in the mountains for some lunch.
Her Dad ( my Uncle Todd ) has fought one of the toughest cancers for many, many years.. and has been in remission for a few years.   As I listened to her speak and share her testimony of her Fathers journey through it.. and the trials that strengthened her.. I wept.

It felt cleansing to just sit and cry.

My Uncle Todd was sitting up on the stand.. and I felt an enormous amount of Thankfulness and love that he is still here with us.  His life is truly a blessing from the Lord.. and his trial through Cancer ( for so many years ) has strengthened my Testimony in Priesthood blessings.. Miracles.. and Faith.

I felt an abundance of Love and Joy as I sat there in the meeting.

I am sure my Grandparents and Father were there with us for this special day.

* It has been 7 months now since Dad passed away.  I can see how truly "time" does help to heal.. and this past month has been extra comforting to me.  I embrace all of those comforting days.. since I never know when the sad and depressing ones will "hit."  But-- January has surprisingly brought more joy than sadness.

* I went to the Doctor a few weeks ago.. and had them take a ton of blood from me.
I wanted everything *tested* before I got serious with weight loss and exercising.

The results came back Friday.. and I am oh-so-pleased that my thyroid, blood sugar.. everything.. looks great.. except for ONE area.  My Vitamin D.
I was extremely low.   I asked the Doctor if he could just prescribe me a Vacation to Hawaii -- and although he laughed.. he said I was so low.. I would need some serious supplements.  So-- I am taking 1.25 mg ( 50,000 units ) twice a week.  They will re-test me in 3 months to see if it improves.  More proof that I NEED sun! 

* We watched Downton Abbey last night.. and I cried through most of the episode.  So sad!!
If you are not watching this.. why on earth not?  My DVD is traveling through my neighborhood right now.. and it makes me happy to have more friends to discuss it with!

* I received a happy package from a friend over the weekend.. and I couldn't believe the timing.
It was one of those moments that you KNOW the Lord had a hand in it.
I have so LOVED that blogging has brought me some of the finest--most elect women in the world to learn from.  You inspire me with your friendship and goodness!

* I hate that life is not Fair.
I know my Mother will kill me for saying anything.. but this is my blog.. and she can be mad at me.
It is only out of love and concern that I type out my thoughts.

My Mother doesn't have any time for herself.  She works.. and then heads down south ( 30 minutes away ) to see her parents.  My Grandma Tenney is in a Rehab center ( healing from a broken hip ) and my Grandfather with early signs of Dementia is home alone.

My Mother, Aunts and Uncles are breaking up all of their spare time to serve/sacrifice and be with their parents.

My Mother hasn't even had time to fully "grieve" over my Father.. and she has had to completely forget herself and her own health-- to worrying about her parents.

While I know this well... and I would never trade those days I had being with Dad.. I am seriously worried about her.  About how long she can keep going in this state.

Some serious decisions have to be made... about the care of my Grandparents.. and I see more and more stress added weekly. 

I wish I could fix the problems.

I hate to feel useless.  I wish I could do more to help her.

I wish my Mom could just relax.

I wish she could have time to really Grieve.

I wish she could start taking care of herself.

I wish she could sleep and rest.  I don't think she has had a great night's sleep in 9 months.

I don't want to "add" more stress... so I am trying to think of ways I can help make the burdens lighter.

I wish I could.

Today I am Grateful for:

Family.  It was so fun to be with so much family yesterday.
The start of a New week.  New Goals.  New hopes.
Compliments.
Planned Vacations
Blogging.